You Win Some. You Lose Some.
☆ August 3, 2012
Daisy calved Saturday night ~ she had a breech birth and it was hard and horrible and I thought I might lose her. My vet came out to assist and, against all odds, the calf was born alive.
He was up and nursing after the birth, and bouncing around the next morning, nursing on one of Daisy’s front teats as I milked the back ones. But he started failing that evening, and though we did everything we could, he died two days later.
What can you say about a baby calf who died? {Who knows the book whose first line I just slightly altered?} I can’t really scream and cry about things being unfair, because in the last six weeks, Sir Baby and Daisy have been thisclose to death and pulled through beautifully. But it’s still terribly sad.
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August 3rd, 2012 @ 7:46 am
So sorry to hear, how is Daisey? Is she looking for her baby or does she know the calf is gone? Can you find her another calf to adopt?
August 3rd, 2012 @ 7:48 am
Oh, I’m sorry. That line alone (Love Story!) made me choke up.
August 3rd, 2012 @ 7:50 am
I used the same line when my son was run over by his school bus at the age of 8. After two months in the hospital I wrote a letter to the Editor of our newspaper, and started it out–“what do you say about a boy who lived?” Is the book “Love Story”?
August 3rd, 2012 @ 7:56 am
A life well-lived encounters so many losses. And yet, we absorb these wrenchingly painful events and keep going. Thank goodness you have your beloved Daisy. Hugs to you all.
August 3rd, 2012 @ 8:00 am
Poor little thing, I know you did everything that could of been done!
August 3rd, 2012 @ 8:08 am
Perhaps the little guy is somewhere wonderful with Houdini and Ricardo having a grand time.
I thought that sort of thing when ever I lost one of my furry friends. It doesn’t heal the aching heart, but it does dull the pain a bit.
And as for screaming, how about a real good coyote howl? I am sure Charlie and Chloe (and perhaps Eli) would understand and join in. Aside from the fact that it is fun,it’s a great tension release.
August 3rd, 2012 @ 8:08 am
So sorry to hear this, but I’m glad Sir Baby and Daisy are fine.
August 3rd, 2012 @ 8:10 am
well fuck.
August 3rd, 2012 @ 8:22 am
I’m sorry Shreve. I had a feeling he wasn’t gonna make it. You have so many animals. You just can’t win em all. Thank Goodness Daisy is OK. I hope she doesn’t get too depressed over her lose….
August 3rd, 2012 @ 8:23 am
LOSS
August 3rd, 2012 @ 8:30 am
I’m so sorry. Here’s hoping that the furry, fuzzy love surrounding you on a daily basis helps heal the hurt.
August 3rd, 2012 @ 8:33 am
Sorry the little guy didn’t make it, always sad to lose a young one but not as hard I think as losing one you are accustomed to and have history with. It is all part of the cycle.
In the catacombs there is a plaque that says “As you are now, I once was. As I am now you will be”.
As much as we try to stop it we all will lose eventually and that is as it should be. Live the life you have now to the fullest if possible.
August 3rd, 2012 @ 8:34 am
I’m so sorry Shreve. So good that Daisy and Sir Baby are thriving though.
August 3rd, 2012 @ 8:37 am
Just read your other twitter, ok does that cream taste like zucchini? I’m wondering if zucchini has an herbal quality and Daisy was aware something was wrong and was trying to fix it by downing them?
August 3rd, 2012 @ 9:02 am
It is very sad, as you said. I hope Daisy will be o.k. physically and mentally. *HUGS* to all.
August 3rd, 2012 @ 9:12 am
i guess i missed the daisy drama.
really so sad. but daisy will now foster another baby? isn’t that what i learned via your posts last year, i think?
When you referenced the calf as ‘it’ in a tweet i figured it wasn’t gonna be a good report, i’ve been waiting for it.
August 3rd, 2012 @ 9:13 am
Prayers to all, along with hugs. Life isn’t always easy or the way we want it to be. We have to take the ups and downs. Without the downs, the ups would seem less miraculous (such as the healing of Sir Baby and Daisy). I do hope there will always be more ups than downs in your life and the lives of those associated with the Farmily:)
August 3rd, 2012 @ 9:15 am
Shreve, I think one of the most powerful things about this blog is how you embrace the full circle of life. Thank you.
@ Phyllis – As much as we might feel sad about the death of a newborn calf, the death of an 8 year old son is unfathomable. I hope you don’t mind that I share some of your tears today. My thoughts and wishes for you are beyond words, but they are heartfelt and sincere.
August 3rd, 2012 @ 9:19 am
Oh Shreve. If you and Mike and Daisy couldn’t fix the baby, no one could. xo
August 3rd, 2012 @ 9:24 am
My sympathies. Your empathy informs your writing and photography, but also exacts a price.
To be so connected to the world is to feel loss when the world, in a sense, doesn’t care. Or to put it another way, we are the part of the world that mourns. It is one of our species’ greatest pains and strengths.
August 3rd, 2012 @ 9:28 am
I am so sorry Shreve, glad Daisy pulled through, she must miss him…hugs to you and Daisy!
August 3rd, 2012 @ 9:30 am
I’m sorry.
August 3rd, 2012 @ 9:36 am
A breech birth is so hard on the mother and the baby. I, too, am so sorry for this painful loss. Your cyber friends and family are gathered at The Wake with you, mourning this loss in your farmily and anxious to know how you and Daisy are doing.
August 3rd, 2012 @ 9:40 am
If only we could understand the *why* of a life cut way too short, maybe it would help to ease the mourning? But “sometimes the dragon wins” is all too often as much solace as we get. And it’s entirely inadequate.
When the veil of life’s seeming fairness and dependability gets ripped, our choices are to collapse, or stand up and appreciate every single minute that’s given to us and the other beings we love. (Understandably, it can be a journey to travel between those choices.)
I am greatful for your willingness to share your life, your experiences, your perspective, and your farmily with us. My life is richer for it.
Hugs to you and yours in your time of sorrow.
August 3rd, 2012 @ 9:47 am
Oh, so sorry to hear of the calf’s death. That’s the problem with ranching– there’s always a few deaths mixed in with the births.
Take care of yourself, give Daisy extra TLC, and know we’re all sharing in your sorrow.
August 3rd, 2012 @ 9:55 am
I’m so sorry to hear the baby didn’t make it. I had a feeling when there was no picture or update that something was probably wrong, and you were dealing with it one way or another.
But it’s always good to hear that Daisy and Sir Baby are recovering.
Sends you ALL great big *HUGS!*
August 3rd, 2012 @ 9:55 am
I am beyond sad. My thoughts are with you and Daisy and the little calf
August 3rd, 2012 @ 10:14 am
yay for you for knowing that love brings you back from loss, (something it’s taken my whole 50+ years to learn from loss suffered at age 13).
August 3rd, 2012 @ 10:19 am
Poor little mite. I am sorry for your loss, but I am glad Daisy pulled through. No matter how many times I have seen loss in farming, it never gets easier :-(
August 3rd, 2012 @ 10:27 am
Shreve, sorry to hear. I’m sad he didn’t make it, but oh so grateful Daisy did.
August 3rd, 2012 @ 10:27 am
I’m so sorry for your and Daisy’s loss. Glad Daisy is okay, but it is never easy to lose someone, human or critter, even if you only had them for a little while. :(
August 3rd, 2012 @ 10:43 am
I’m so sorry for your loss Shreve. Give Daisy and Sir Baby extra hugs.
August 3rd, 2012 @ 10:50 am
I was so sad to hear of your loss and I hope that Daisy will be all right. She’s a beautiful cow and I know that she will miss her baby.
August 3rd, 2012 @ 11:13 am
Oh darn – I’m so sorry! Even though you haven’t had time to really bond and get to know them well, there’s just something so heartbreaking when a calf dies – they are just so little and precious and so new, and such a symbol of hope and promise, it just is a special flavor of awful when they die.
August 3rd, 2012 @ 11:22 am
I’m so sorry, Shreve.
August 3rd, 2012 @ 11:27 am
I’m sorry, Shreve.
August 3rd, 2012 @ 11:34 am
I’m so sorry about Daisy’s calf. How is she doing?
August 3rd, 2012 @ 11:44 am
Shreve, I see your posts much too late to be one of the first to respond. Anyhow, ‘Love Story’ of course. And, I’m sorry to hear about Daisy’s calf.
August 3rd, 2012 @ 12:07 pm
I am so very sorry for your loss, Shreve.
August 3rd, 2012 @ 12:10 pm
You have brought to your readers a connection to the Animal Life that we had been missing- thank you. Thank you for sharing all the joy that they bring and the occasional sorrow for it is all a part of the process… of living. I’m so sorry for the loss of your little one~
August 3rd, 2012 @ 12:20 pm
sad, but sometimes we have to accept natures reminders about our place.
marg, thanks for your quote from the catacombs. as i get older, i find myself thinking those thots sometimes when i’m with some impatient younger people, but i usually add ‘if you’re lucky’ at the end. haven’t said it out loud yet, but that might be easier to do now that i can say i’m quoting the real antiquities.
August 3rd, 2012 @ 12:34 pm
Awww, poor little guy. I hope Daisy won’t mourn too long. She’s produced some wonderful additions to your family and I was really hoping this baby would join his siblings as member of the gang.
August 3rd, 2012 @ 12:41 pm
Shreve, so sorry about your loss. Hope Daisy and Sir Baby continue to improve.
August 3rd, 2012 @ 1:33 pm
It is a sad loss regardless. I hope Daisy and Sir Baby continue healing, as well as you.
August 3rd, 2012 @ 1:37 pm
Dear Shreve, So sorry for the loss of your new baby. My thoughts are with you and yours. Thank you for sharing your life with us. x
August 3rd, 2012 @ 2:17 pm
Marg – very well said.
So sorry to read about this news. My heart aches for what you must be feeling.
I can’t remember where I read this: “Life is pain. Life will always be hard, it will always break your heart. So you might as well be deliriously happy and challenged in the in-between times.”
August 3rd, 2012 @ 2:39 pm
Ricardo now has a calf to look after in his special pasture on the other side. Prayers coming your way for your farmily.
August 3rd, 2012 @ 2:53 pm
So, so sorry for your loss. Will keep sending thoughts of care and love to you and yours, both here and not here.
August 3rd, 2012 @ 3:45 pm
I’m so sorry Shreve.
August 3rd, 2012 @ 4:11 pm
It’s been a year since Mr Ricardo passed on, I still miss him.
Sorry Shreve.
August 3rd, 2012 @ 4:12 pm
I’m so very sorry for your loss, Shreve. How is Daisy coping?
I like Heidi’s comment above that Ricardo now has a calf to look after in his pasture on the other side.
Sending love to you and the farmily.
August 3rd, 2012 @ 4:28 pm
im sorry
August 3rd, 2012 @ 5:11 pm
that is very sad news.i was wondering what happens now with daisy,how long do you keep getting milk?how long until she gets another chance to make a calf?is she totally out of the woods?you really are very lucky to still have her.i hope the poor thing isnt too down.i wish you all health and good luck.
August 3rd, 2012 @ 5:13 pm
Oh Shreve how sad. I have to agree with the other posters that the baby is running around with Richardo and Houdini.
August 3rd, 2012 @ 5:25 pm
How very sad.
I’m sure Daisy is mourning for her lost baby.
And I agree with those above. Ricardo is waiting to add one more to his special herd.
“Where are the eyes that looked so mild, hurroo, hurroo
Where are the eyes that looked so mild, hurroo, hurroo
Where are the eyes that looked so mild
When my poor heart you first beguiled
Why did ye scadaddle from me and the child
Oh Johnny, I hardly knew ye.”
August 3rd, 2012 @ 5:36 pm
I’m sorry you and your farmily had to go through that. <3 I am so glad Daisy is ok.
August 3rd, 2012 @ 6:22 pm
Oh, so sorry for all of you. I wonder if the breach birthing did him some damage? Give Daisy an extra hug from all of us out of here in the online world…
August 3rd, 2012 @ 7:05 pm
So sorry for your loss.
August 3rd, 2012 @ 7:29 pm
I’m so sorry Daisy’s calf didn’t make it, but as Renee said, I’m so glad Daisy is okay.
August 3rd, 2012 @ 7:33 pm
oh, I’m so sorry. The hard part of being with and loving animals. I hope Daisy is doing ok. One of the reasons I did not go to veterinarian school – worked with vets and I can’t stand it when the patients died. But when one is saved — :)
my thoughts are with you!
August 3rd, 2012 @ 7:47 pm
I am so sorry also Really makes me sad
August 3rd, 2012 @ 8:39 pm
The circle of life sucks at times. I’m really sorry about your calf.
August 3rd, 2012 @ 8:39 pm
(Actually Daisy’s calf.)
August 3rd, 2012 @ 8:57 pm
Hardest part of loving anything — letting it go.
August 3rd, 2012 @ 9:07 pm
So sorry about the calf. He’s with Ricardo and Houdini. Hugs to all
August 3rd, 2012 @ 9:34 pm
SORRY…
August 4th, 2012 @ 4:58 am
Having lost a great many lambs (and one calf from back when we had cattle) I know what you are going through. It never gets easier but the pain lessens with time. I echo others’s sentiments – Ricardo and Houdini are romping with this male calf somewhere on the other side of the Rainbow Bridge, in a pasture rich with clover.
August 4th, 2012 @ 7:40 am
So sad to hear about Daisys’ calf…very glad to hear that Daisy is okay though…this is Mother Nature at work..we don’t understand the reason, but know it has happened for a reason..my thoughts are with you Shreve, and all of the farmily..
August 4th, 2012 @ 9:28 am
Do you notice any lingering “shifted” behavior from your animals when they lose a calf or animal companion they spend a lot of time with? Do they noticeably grieve?
August 4th, 2012 @ 9:57 am
sorry that the little guy didn’t make it.
August 4th, 2012 @ 1:01 pm
{{{{{{{{HUGZZZZ}}}}}}}}}
August 4th, 2012 @ 3:24 pm
Just started reading your book, The Daily Co;yote. I am hooked…had to look up your blog. So interesting….will follow….keep up the good work. We went thru Ten Sleep a few years ago. Love WY…..Janet
August 4th, 2012 @ 7:21 pm
So sorry the calf didn’t make it, but I’m glad Daisy is all right.
August 5th, 2012 @ 7:00 am
This is sad news. Any speculation on why the calf faltered? As someone with no farm-life exposure, it’s hard for me to understand what goes wrong in cases like this.
August 5th, 2012 @ 9:54 am
I am so sorry to hear this. You are in our thoughts today.
August 5th, 2012 @ 8:08 pm
Well shoot… so, so sorry, Shreve. Relieved that Daisy is recovering. Hugs to all of you, and blessings upon all of you.
Eclecta (#18) – perfectly said to Phyllis:
“As much as we might feel sad about the death of a newborn calf, the death of an 8 year old son is unfathomable. I hope you don’t mind that I share some of your tears today. My thoughts and wishes for you are beyond words, but they are heartfelt and sincere.”
My heart breaks for you, Phyllis. God bless.
August 5th, 2012 @ 10:34 pm
I’m so sorry for your loss, Shreve. I wish you and Daisy both what comfort you can find.
August 6th, 2012 @ 10:00 am
I’m so sorry about this Shreve. I know you did everything in your power to save the little guy.
August 6th, 2012 @ 10:28 am
Oh, Shreve, what a heart-break to lose the calf like that. Since he and Daisy survived his birth, it must have come as an even bigger shock to lose him days later. I can guess at reasons until I’m blue in the face, but nothing can change the outcome and that saddens me. I can only hope Daisy has fully recovered and that her grief will lessen with time. I hope your pain and sense of loss will also ease with time.
Sending hugs and blessings to you and all the farmily.
T.
August 6th, 2012 @ 1:10 pm
This world can be tremendously unfair to small beings. I know this too well.
All I can find solace in is caring for things that grow. I hope you find some peace with this sad event. If I find any, I’ll send you a bit.
August 6th, 2012 @ 5:29 pm
so sorry to hear the baby had a really short life
August 6th, 2012 @ 7:06 pm
I’m so very sorry, Shreve.
August 8th, 2012 @ 12:13 pm
Sorry to hear such sad news.
This is farm/ranch life you take the good and the bad. The bad part hurts every time, you never get use to it. Blessings to you and Daisy.
August 14th, 2012 @ 2:02 pm
Just catching up from being on vacation – so very sorry for your loss, Shreve . . . it is never easy . . . warming thoughts your way . . .
August 15th, 2012 @ 10:02 am
I am also just back from vacation and catching up on things . . . so very sorry for your and Daisy’s loss.
I am thinking of a beautiful poem by James Dickey called “The Heaven Of Animals;” it’s too long to put here in the comment stream, but I’ll try to send it to you via e-mail.
Hugs to you, Mike, and all your blessed beasts.
October 1st, 2012 @ 12:07 am
what you’ve said makes sense, and i can understand it very clearly, thanks. lista de email lista de email lista de email lista de email lista de email