Summer 2010

Yesterday, I went to court.  I was there for the sentencing of the man who spent this summer stalking me.

It began in June, became very intense throughout July, and, the first weekend of August, he was arrested at the motel in my town.  He had a loaded .44 Magnum with him.  For those who don’t know guns, a .44 Magnum is a handgun that will stop a 1,000 pound grizzly bear.

He’s been in the county jail since then, held on a bond that was too high for him to post.  Today, he is being released.  He was found guilty of stalking, given the maximum sentence of six months in jail, but with “time served” deducted from the sentence and the rest waived on terms of probation, he is being released today.

When I woke up this morning, I felt sad, depressed, and disillusioned by the court’s decision.  Those feelings quickly morphed into anger.  I am not scared. I am ANGRY.

The sentencing drove home a point with which I have become more and more intimate over the summer: when it comes right down to it, there is only one person who can keep you safe.  And that is you.  The only person who can keep me safe is me.

This is why I found such a profound connection in Lisbeth Salander – she is an example of what I have been learning and living and becoming.  I’m not necessarily promoting her methods, but I am promoting her underlying truth:  The System failed her and she learned to be self reliant.  And she excelled at it.

This is also why I will be writing more about this in the coming weeks – though this man found me and became obsessed with me through my websites, attacks on women happen every day, and the vast majority are women who have “normal” lives and no “public” persona.

Also, I’m not pregnant.  If I had a penny for every person who emailed me this summer asking if I was pregnant, I’d probably be able to afford a ranch.  New policy: All personal questions must be accompanyed by a penny!  {just kidding}  But, to those of you who sensed something major was happening and assumed I was pregnant, let it be known that I am not pregnant, nor was I at any point this summer (praise the IUD!).  This is what was going on.

Next post in this series is HERE