I’m Not Married
☆ April 1, 2013
My favorite comment from this morning’s post, from Amy in AMA: Congratulations…you got us good! :)
Don’t be mad! It was spelled out the whole time; I haven’t changed anything about the post except to bold the first letter of each sentence – scroll down to see. I thought the acrostic made it obvious, but alas, it wasn’t even mentioned until comment 59…. Karin, you and my sister share a name, and you and I share a brain.
I did not expect the responses I got. When the earnest comments started coming in I was like, oh god this is bad. And when they started piling up I was like, oh wow, this is interesting. On many levels.
But the simplest and most obvious thing to be gleaned from the comments is that marriage is a big deal, a wonderful deal. I choose to be unmarried, but it’s pretty awesome to know that if Mike and I should change our minds, we could do it. It’s beyond devastating that there are so many people who want to get married, and deserve to get married, but are prohibited from doing so. Everyone should have the right. I hope one day soon, we will get to celebrate marriage equality.
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26 Responses to “I’m Not Married”
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April 1st, 2013 @ 6:43 pm
:) Marriage IS a joyful thing and everyone should be able to enjoy it if that’s what they want. Here’s to marriage equality.
I did realize my reaction to your “announcement” actually said a lot about me, eh? But I’m ok with that.
April 1st, 2013 @ 7:10 pm
I missed your April Fool’s post earlier. Good one!! I have been engaged for 5 years now ;-) We see no need to rush down the aisle. Some day. Or not. Either way, we are very happy in our life together!
April 1st, 2013 @ 7:14 pm
what a great post – and I love your sentiments regarding marriage equality.
April 1st, 2013 @ 7:49 pm
Took me trying two times to finally get it right. And it is oh so right for me. But as I said before, if you and Mike are happy and in love, that is what matters. I support love.
April 1st, 2013 @ 8:05 pm
Those of us who read the comment on our little phones might not have ever even seen the setup properly. Thanks, I guess I couldn’t escape the day without feeling like a proper idiot at least once. I’ll bear that in mind from here on out.
April 1st, 2013 @ 8:45 pm
I saw the acrostic and thought nothing of it.
I thought you two just decided that you’d be marrying fools and as such chose April 1st for your wedding day and anniversary.
Must say I’m a bit disappointed.
But whatever floats your boat. As long as you’re happy, married or single, together, whatever. I’m sure the animals don’t care one way or the other.
April 1st, 2013 @ 9:58 pm
you got us good! mazel tov to that! married or not, just be happy.
April 2nd, 2013 @ 6:44 am
I tend to avoid the internet on April Fool’s for that very reason, so I didn’t see the post till this morning.
But I raise a glass in agreement for marriage equality for all! <3
April 2nd, 2013 @ 7:30 am
Very creative writing Shreve! I too am one who celebrates an anniversary on April 1. It was 24 years for us. I remember being disappointed that no one played any jokes on us that day. The only thing we did was put a plastic tiny black couple in wedding attire on top of the cake. (We’re white folk)
April 2nd, 2013 @ 8:19 am
I found the comments interesting too. Everyone gushes about weddings and pregnancies as if they are goal posts that are absolutely crucial to our happiness. Only my blogger friend ‘Yukon Yahoos’ offers up congrats for divorce with an hilarious card for sale to acknowledge the occasion. I’ve been married for 47 years and love my hubbie dearly but don’t think it is the ONLY way to go. Yeah to ALL people who do though.
April 2nd, 2013 @ 8:23 am
I kinda thought it was bogus, especially when you got to the baby bit. And at 9 AM CST it would have been 7 AM in WY and I really didn’t think any city or country offices would have been open for a wedding hitch that early – but if it was true then I wanted to get my warm wishes in.
Me personally, I have been married twice and I am DONE with that institution. Shacking up is fine, but forget the “your mine ownership” that is implied with getting married. I am NOT
anybody’s property. I might be someone’s partner but forget all that other stuff. I honestly in this day and age don’t understand why anyone would want to get married.
April 2nd, 2013 @ 8:49 am
Just goes to show how many romantics and how many realists you have among your readers. (myself being the latter).
April 2nd, 2013 @ 9:35 am
Thanks so much for your comments about Marriage Equality! As someone who has been with my wife for over 17 years, I am happy to say that we finally got legally married in New York last year, but alas, neither the Federal Government nor our state of Georgia recognize our marriage. I have the utmost respect for straight couples who forego marriage, but for us the symbolism & rights are too important not to try to obtain.
PS I immediately realized it was April Fools when you made your post yesterday as I had already been “gotten” by my wife earlier that morning!
April 2nd, 2013 @ 9:39 am
The acrostic is genius– I didn’t even notice that (weird). I LOVE April Fool’s Day and truly appreciate that you ‘got us’~ what fun! I am a Singleton, too, and entirely agree with you about marriage. ~~~aloha~~~
April 2nd, 2013 @ 10:41 am
Lmao….I feel like such a dumb ass. Good one Shreve!
April 2nd, 2013 @ 12:23 pm
ok, so now i have to comment. at first i felt happy for you because you said you were happy about it. then you got to the baby carriage part, and i went hey, wait a minute, what day is it? pretty clever how you spelled it out tho– we’ll all be on to that now!
i did get married on an april first. still am. and i’ve been contemplating the element of foolishness in that decision for the past 33 years. but we’re all fools — we need to be, or we’d never take any chances.
April 2nd, 2013 @ 1:32 pm
Did not clue in because I read it on my cell phone and it did not appear the way you wrote it.
I figured you and Mike had a change of heart and decided to get married.
Whether it happens today or never as long as you two are happy then that is all that matters.
So far I have done everything in my life backwards and have given up on what others think or say.
April 2nd, 2013 @ 1:34 pm
Well done!
April 3rd, 2013 @ 6:41 am
Funny. I completely missed the acrostic but my thought when I read it was along the lines of: oh no, another one bites the dust to those overpowering cultural norms ;). I did think that the baby thing sounded very unlike you.
In terms of marriage, I went ahead and got married because if I hadn’t I wouldn’t have been able to live with my significant other since I was on a student visa. But overall, the way I basically feel about marriage is that it is the state or church butting into my private relationships where they have no business being. I see no reason why a relationship should only be considered serious after it has been blessed by some entity of which I am neither a member nor a believer.
In terms of having the relationship “approved” by the state, I would prefer if cohabitation entitled you to the same tax advantages, being notified in case of disease, etc. as marriage does. This also means that there would be a greater freedom in whom you define as “family”.
Finally, the women I respect most in the world – including you – are people who define themselves outside of a traditional relationship while still being connected, loving and engaged so I guess I´m just a bit biased that way.
April 3rd, 2013 @ 4:53 pm
I saw the acrostic immediately and didn’t think for a moment that you had gotten married…LOL So funny how we all see things very differently.
April 3rd, 2013 @ 11:53 pm
I knew it was an AFJ when I read it, yet part of me wanted it to be true. Que sera, sera, to quote Doris Day’s signature song. Keep on keepin’ on, Shreve.
April 5th, 2013 @ 11:21 am
Hilarious. All I can say, you got me!
April 5th, 2013 @ 12:52 pm
Marriage creates so much mixed emotion. Too much opinion on who should and shouldn’t get married. It sounds like you have found the happiness in your relationship and that’s gorgeous!
April 5th, 2013 @ 6:22 pm
In all honesty, until I’d thought about it for a bit- particularly your comment about possibly having a kid- I was taking it at face value. And the acrostic completely escaped me.
No harm done. I’m glad you and Mike have a good relationship that you’re happy with; everything else is bonus. And I definitely share your sentiment about marriage equality.
April 7th, 2013 @ 7:34 am
I am a traditionalist. I define marriage as being between a man and a woman.
I accept that “rights” conveyed to individuals other than a man and a woman may be defined as “civil unions”; their love for each other will not be compromised by this designation, but I do not personally accept that the term “marriage” applies.
April 8th, 2013 @ 11:13 am
next thing ya know mikey will be getting manicures and s~ will be runnin a scooter shop/tattoo parlor in san francisco. whews, that was quite the scare.